“I’d Like the One-Page Menu, Please.”

We think having more choices is always better. Here’s why we’re wrong.

5/26/20264 min read

The stress reducing power of simplicity.

STORY: Every diner has three things in common: endless cups of coffee, mammoth slices of cakes and pies, and enough breakfast options to feed the whole town and its neighbors.

My recent venture to our local haunt confirmed this fact. I hadn’t visited a diner in years. When I lifted the laminated menu, the pages felt as heavy as the large plates the waiters carried, complete with oversized omelets and shovels’-full of home fries. I counted twelve pages, with each entry typed in the tiniest of fonts. I had arrived at the diner thinking eggs would hit the spot; now faced with a novella of options. I skimmed the first page. Eggs over easy? Scrambled? Omelets with vegetables, cheese, goat cheese, egg whites? Oaxaca omelets (which required me to Google the pronunciation out of interest: wah-haw-kah)? The farm omelet, seafood omelet…

The waiter comes by, notepad in hand. I apologize with a “We need another minute.”

She walks away. My friend sighs impatiently. “Can you pick something? I’m starving.”

“I’m looking,” I answer. I feel pressure to choose quickly. Maybe I should try something simpler. I flipped to page two. Pancakes. Which kind? Pancakes with blueberries? Pancakes with apples? Pancakes with (insert every other fruit here and it was on the menu)? Buckwheat, buttermilk, gluten-free. With what side? Bacon, turkey bacon, honey bacon, sausage, vegetarian sausage, ham, toast with jam, cinnamon toast, buttered toast, wheat, rye, white, sourdough . . .

(Are you, the reader, feeling overwhelmed yet?)

The waiter returns three more times. Three more times, I say, “Just another minute, really.”

My dining companion rolls her eyes as I waffle (ha!) between choices.

“Hurry up!” my friend finally bursts out.

I pick scrambled eggs and whatever side the waiter recommends. Next time, I’m going somewhere with a one-page menu and limited options.

We often believe that having more choices gives us greater freedom in our lives. In many ways, this can be true. But what happens when you’re already feeling overwhelmed by life? How do you feel when you’re bombarded by stressors? How much mental and emotional capacity do you have to make decisions when you’re maxed out? Choice exhausts us. When we have to make more decisions, and become more tired as a result, we’re experiencing “decision fatigue.” We want (and need) the simple solution (hence the popularity of self-help books offering “simple, easy, and quick” solutions).

People who aren’t suffering from stress also benefit from more limited options. Daniel Pink, a bestselling author on areas such as science, business, and creativity, observes in his Masterclass, “We have overvalued addition and undervalued subtraction.” Daniel describes a study in which researchers gave people the option of taste testing (24?) varieties of jam and then compared this to offering three varieties of jam. Of those who tried the 24 varieties, only 3% bought jam. Contrast this with those who tried the three varieties – 30% purchased jam! (Masterclass)

Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation, preferring a few options to countless others?

Let’s look at another scenario. You’ve had a long but productive Friday at work. You’re looking forward to a quiet evening. You don’t feel stressed, but you crave much-earned downtime. When you come home, your significant other asks you, “When do you want to eat dinner? What are you in the mood for?”

You feel something scratching in your chest. “I don’t care, whatever you have.”

“I’ve got chicken or pasta. Which do you want? Oh, and while I’m thinking of it, did you want to go clothes shopping tomorrow? You wanted to get a couple of shirts, right? Where did you want to go? And do you want to do that before or after we go to the gym? You said you wanted to start working out on the weekend. We also have church in the morning. Do you think we could fit it in before we . . .”

Anxiety now swells within you. You weren’t stressed when you walked through the door. You’re angry that your peace of mind is disappearing. You interrupt, “I don’t know right now. You decide what we’re doing.”

“I want to do what you want to do.”

Your significant other doesn’t realize what you want to do is nothing in that moment. “It doesn’t matter!” you repeat. You get up and go to your room, looking to escape before your stress gets any greater.

Has this ever happened to you before?

I’ve used examples of becoming overwhelmed in your personal life. We have some control over our ability to tune out. We can simplify our choices. With school or work, though, we usually don’t have that freedom. We can’t tell our professors or bosses, “Sorry, I’ve made enough choices today.” We have imperfect control over our assignments. We can share with friends, family, and significant others when we need time to decompress. We can also offer the “why” if we feel it’s helpful context (although you can also opt to keep your reasons private. We’ll see why in future posts): “Thanks for asking for my input on these things. I’m pretty tired right now, it was a long day. It’s hard for me to make any more decisions. Let me get back to you about our plans after dinner? I’ll love whatever you cook for us, I can have either. Thanks for understanding.”

You’ll be surprised at how far your communication goes with the other person. You’re letting them know that a) you’re listening, b) you value that they want to include you in the decision-making, and c) you’ll give your opinions later, not never. This last note depends on if you end up refreshed that evening. If not, you can repeat what you’ve said earlier.

Start thinking about what you can remove from your life, and see how your stress lessens.

Key Takeaway: Less is more. We make hundreds of decisions every day; the more we make, the more fatigued we feel, the greater our stress when pressured to continue to choose. We can’t always control when a situation requires us to choose an outcome. We can communicate to others our desire to step away, reenergize, and revisit a decision.

This Week’s Action: